


This World Keeps Spinning Around

by castiel_ambrose



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Burn, other characters to be added - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-03
Updated: 2018-09-11
Packaged: 2019-07-06 04:26:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15878520
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/castiel_ambrose/pseuds/castiel_ambrose
Summary: Based off of this video right here: https://youtu.be/JYnDx1ZmRNkTitle from High Hopes by KodalineCastiel Novak met Dean Winchester in their shared high school classes. He was new and rebellious, and the total heartthrob of every girl in a five-mile radius. Castiel felt the same, even if he never said it. Fast forward twenty years, and Dean waltzes right into the Gas-n-Sip he's working at, acting like he's the exact same, that nothing ever happened.Or, the one where Castiel is trapped in the past, unable to let go, and Dean is already looking towards the future, the past way behind him.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This is my first time attempting something like this. As stated in the description, this is based off a video by HelloFromTheOtherSIde, which you should immediately watch. Enjoy!

_ Novak. _

The name tag wasn’t that big, but even without it, Dean knew who it was as he approached the counter. Another man left for the door and blue eyes flitted up to meet his own. It was clear to see emotions flying through them as he stiffened - why? Dean gave him an easy smile as he put his package of beef jerky on the counter.

“Hey, Cas.” The other man almost looked like a deer in headlights, but he took the jerky and began to cash it out.

“Hello, Dean.” He was quiet, voice no more than polite, and it almost made Dean’s smile falter. “Will that be all?”

“Gee, nice to see you too, Cas.” He furrowed his brow. Cas sighed.

“I’m sorry. You surprised me.”

_ Well, the feeling is mutual,  _ Dean thought as he took his snack. “I didn’t expect to see you, either. Thought you were in California livin’ it up?”

“I had been. I decided to come back and live here a while.” Cas didn’t elaborate, knowing that he would if Dean kept pushing.

“Hey, maybe I’ll-” A vibration in his front pocket and he automatically knew that it was Garth probably wondering where the Hell he was. Nice enough guy, but horrible to leave alone, even if Dean did really need to be there. “I gotta go. But I’ll see you around?” Dean asked as he backed up towards the door, watching Castiel for a reaction as he did. It wasn’t until Cas gave a small, almost reluctant nod that he grinned and waved, giving a small “See ya, Cas” before turning and leaving for good. Castiel watched him all the way to the car, both surprised and not surprised to see that he was still driving that Impala. The sight of it almost made him shake his head because of course, Dean Winchester didn’t change at all.

_ His leg was bouncing like crazy, which wasn’t exactly new to him and didn’t pull his attention, even as his desk lightly trembled underneath him. Midterms had finished and it was the first day back to school since. The familiar clacking of his teacher’s heels on the tile made him look up from his Macbeth review. The person behind her, however, made him nearly forget that they were there. _

Dean Winchester _ , she said his name was, and he fit the name perfectly, wearing a leather jacket too big for him and an upward tilt of his lips that made him look… some way that Castiel couldn’t place. He walked through the rows, knowing that the eyes of every student were on him, watching closely. He looked like he didn’t care, the epitome of confidence even as he appraised all of them right back. Castiel would be lying if he had said he wasn’t doing the same until he realized that Dean was a row away, a seat behind him. He watched until green eyes by chance looked over at him, and the other boy’s small smile widened, almost aimed in his direction. Castiel fidgeted as soon as he did and quickly turned to look back down at his desk. _

_ His leg slowly started to bounce again. _

“Young man?” An insistent voice pulled Castiel out of his trance and back towards the present as he realized that there were people in line that really wanted to be out of it, and he gave apologies to each of them and worked as quickly as he could to get them going. He considered himself lucky that his manager hadn’t been here to see that or see his extreme need to take an hour-long break because he should’ve known better, and Dean Winchester was back.

* * *

 

Dean pulled into the parking lot the next day, earlier than last time. The November wind promised rain later in the day and should’ve chilled him more than it did. He leaned on Baby and watched Cas over the top of his car, through the glass of the storefront window. Twenty years had definitely changed him; he seemed to have filled out, no longer the scrawny, pale kid wearing long sleeved sweaters in May. The California sun had done wonders for him, too, giving him a good tan. Physically, it was so different that Dean might not have recognized him if he hadn’t known him for two years, hadn’t considered him a best friend.

His eyes hadn’t changed, though. If there was anything his deadbeat father taught him, it was that eyes were probably the most important part to pay attention too; it was there that you could tell everything about a person. The color was the same shade of blue, and he still looked… hurt. Almost sad. But they had recognized him immediately, and Dean planned to use that fact.

Cas left the counter and Dean took that as an opportunity. He had given himself a window of time before he had to be on the road again. Not many people were inside, considering how early it was, and Dean felt relief at the thought that he didn’t have to share Cas’ attention.

The other man came out of the back room, carrying a cardboard box of canned soup. Whatever expression was on his face from before was taken over by the expression yesterday; one of surprise and almost worry.

“Hey, Cas.” Dean smiled in greeting. “Need some help?”

Cas looked down at the box in his hands before looking up at Dean, almost incredulously. “With my job?”

Dean shrugged. “Just trying to help out.” He followed Cas down an aisle as he began to stock the items. “Speaking of which, when did you start to work here? I haven’t seen you before.”

“I’ve worked here for about a month now. I used to work night shifts, but my manager recently switched me to the opening hours.” Castiel mostly occupied himself with stacking the cans -- perfectionism didn’t seem to leave either, it seemed -- but he looked up at Dean once.

“You should’ve told me you were in back in town, Cas. It’s been, what, twenty years?” Castiel didn’t answer, and Dean sighed. “This is not you, man, you are above this.”

“No, Dean, I’m not.” Cas sighed as well and finally looked up at him. “It’s not a bad job, anyway. It’s rather simple, which I enjoy.” He almost sounded as if he was convincing himself, his tone changing to be more insistent. He reached for the last can to finish but Dean was quicker and snatched it up, grinning a bit at the other’s surprised face.

“Sorry, couldn’t help it. I had to get your attention somehow.” He handed it back and as much as he could see Cas was trying to hide it, there was a returning small smile on his face, barely there.


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel begins to remember what he doesn't want and Dean's ready to advance while Gabriel is in the middle of it.

Thursday was the first time Castiel didn’t see Dean; it was his day off. Luckily -- depending on your point of view -- he wasn’t alone. His older brother Gabriel was home, not having to work until later in the afternoon. He had allowed Castiel to stay with him after his younger brother left California in the dust; it wasn’t as if he had anywhere else to go, anyways. And the good thing was, he didn’t complain or ask for much rent. All Castiel had to do was listen to his rambles and put up with his… everything. That morning, though, it turned out a bit different.

“Gabriel,” Castiel started off, quiet but enough for his brother to look over at him from his reclined position on the couch. He hesitated, knowing that this was probably a bad idea but diving in headfirst. “Do you remember Dean Winchester?”

Gabriel gave him a look as if he had grown a second head. “‘Course I do. He comes into the bar every now and then.” Then Castiel heard the change in his voice and didn’t bother to look up from his soggy cereal to see his grin. “Why you wanna know?”

“He’s shown up a few times at the shop. I didn’t know.” He didn’t mean to sound defensive.   
The television was muted and Cas found it was entirely silent. When he dared to look up, Gabriel was watching him closely, hands under his chin. “You sure that’s the reason?”

“Yes. Quite.”

His brother kept watching him carefully before shrugging and turning back to the television. Cas let out a breath he didn’t know he had been holding and finished the little amount of breakfast he had left and got up to rinse his bowl.

_ The water wasn’t getting warm. It wasn’t surprising; the school barely had air conditioning, let alone a water heater. It didn’t matter in the long run. Castiel just needed to get the cheap paper towel wet to get the spot in his pants out. He hadn’t paid attention and the ketchup in his sandwich had fallen right into his lap before he grabbed the best thing he could to hide it and sheepishly retreat into the bathroom. The last thing he needed was a bunch of people that already hated him laughing in his face and behind his back. _

_ The stain had barely come out and he sighed, turning around and so lost in his thoughts if he had sweatpants that ran right into another guy, the collision so great that they both stumbled back. _

_ “Jesus, the football team practice is at three.” Dean Winchester said, and Castiel froze, standing still as he looked at the other boy. _

_ “I’m really sorry, I didn’t mean to-” _

_ “S’cool, man.” Dean adjusted his jacket and Castiel stepped to the side to let him at the sink and to throw out his towel. “You’re Castiel, right? In English class?” _

_ Castiel just nodded. It had been two weeks since Dean Winchester had practically made this school and this grade his, and he didn’t even think that he knew Castiel’s name. Cleary he was wrong on some level. _

_ “You killed the Shakespeare unit, y’know? Personally, I always hated trying to decipher his shit, but you were on top of it.” Dean partially wiped his hands on his jeans and reached for a towel. He was so animated, unlike what Castiel thought. He always had the image of a cool bad boy. He was wrong  _ again, _ something he wasn’t keen on being. _

_ “Thanks…” He awkwardly gave a half-smile of acknowledgment. It got quiet again and he moved for the door. “I should let you get going.” _

_ Dean’s smile grew a bit confused before he nodded. “If you’re sure.” Then something crossed his mind. “You wanna come sit at my table? You looked kinda lonely over there.” _

Great _ , he thought, not sure how he felt on the comment. “No, thanks. I have stuff to study for, and I have a book I want to read… Maybe some other time.” He left the bathroom abruptly after that, barely caring if anyone else was watching him. He tried not to think about anyone else, especially Dean Winchester. _

_ This wasn’t over. Castiel could feel it in his gut. And he hated it. _

“...Cassie!” A hand touched his shoulder and shook him for a second, making Castiel jump three feet in the air and almost swing. Gabriel was face to face with him and barely ducked the wildly aimed fist, making the wind fall out of Castiel’s sails as he focused and realized where he was.

“Oh my… I’m sorry, Gabriel.” He rubbed his eyes and his hands came away wet. His older brother turned the faucet off.

“You should be sorry. Hot water tank doesn’t last forever.” Gabriel noted before turning back to Castiel. “You sure you’re alright? You were out of it for a hot minute.”

“Yeah, no, I’m-” Castiel cleared his throat. “I’m fine. I was just… thinking. You startled me when you-.”

“I forgot.” Gabriel had a hint of apology in his tone before his eyes darted over to the clock. “I should get ready for tonight. You sure you’re gonna be alright?” He was joking, but there was a small amount of seriousness in his eyes that didn’t go away until Castiel nodded. His brother left and Castiel sighed, looking at the clock as well. There was just enough time to nap for a few hours.

* * *

 

Castiel wondered if Dean had looked for him when he came in. The day off had been spent laying around, for a majority of the time. Castiel usually tried to at least get in a run when he could, but it had been too dark by the time he felt the motivation to do anything. He hated feeling useless more than anything, but there wasn’t anything for him to do.

He used to draw. Used to be rather good at it, he thought. He always considered himself an artist and that it was one of the few things he was good at. Writing wasn’t as easy, but he enjoyed it. Used to allow him to fantasize about things that he never imagined could be possible. 

Now it was just painful to try and get through any of it after California. His sketchbook was gathering dust in a bin in his room. He used pencils for reminders more than anything. It wasn’t  _ great _ but it was alright. He could do it.

“Glad to see you’re back in the land of the living,” Dean remarked as he strolled in around his normal time.

“I didn’t think to tell you. Did you miss me?” He tried to joke, and Dean smiled at the attempt.

“I’ll never tell you.” He grabbed a bag of chips and a diet Cola, waiting for Castiel to check them out as usual. But instead of simply handing over his money, he seemed to stop in consideration before speaking. “Look, you kinda robbed me of a homecoming thing. Do you wanna go out sometime?”

Castiel’s hand stopped as it dispensed his change and he looked back up at Dean. “Out?” He repeated, almost uncomprehendingly.

“Yeah… Like I’ll pay for some food at a diner. Or we can go to your brother’s bar.” His tone went back to a light one at the end, but he still held questioning in it. Cas was at a loss as to why, and a smaller, darker part of him that he tried to forget _questioned_ why. His hesitation must have shown on his face because Dean’s smile dimmed a little.

“Or not. If you’re busy, that’s alright.”

“No, I’ll go. I’m free tomorrow.” Castiel said, a bit quietly but firmly as he gave Dean what was owed to him. “It’d be… fun. And Gabriel is always getting on me about going out more.”

His smile was back and made Castiel’s stomach do a motion it normally didn’t. Dean wrote something on the back of his receipt and handed it over. 

“Thanks. Text me when you get out?”

The other man nodded and soon after Dean left, letting the air out of Castiel’s lungs. He wanted to regret this. He really did. But in the evening when he texted Dean and got a greeting back, it was near impossible. And on some base level deep inside of him, Castiel felt a bit of happiness at that thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed! If you did, please leave a comment/kudos and let me know! Thank you and have a great day!


End file.
